For all the saints

This has been a year of heartbreaking losses.

My dear friend, Muse and patron Brigitte died unexpectedly in January just days after I said goodbye to her in Austria.

The last of the Whiskey Widows and my partner in crime, Sue Barlow, passed away in March.

My student, Lani Bewley, aka "Pink Haired Girl," died suddenly in June.  She was only 22 years old and had just received a BA in Latin in December 2009 and a BA in German in May 2010.

My best friend's father, novelist Vance Bourjaily, died August 31 after one last trip to New Orleans and to Iowa to see his children and grandchildren.

And September 2 was the 10th anniversary of my mother's death.  As he does every year, my father sent me flowers on her birthday, October 30.

Avete atque valete, y'all

The Funeral Crashers

Another Whiskey Widow has gone off to that big cocktail hour in the sky. Mama Sue and I had a special connection because she was a teacher.  She understood that teaching is hard, but so is learning.  And that teachers teach, not because it brings in a big paycheck, but because we love the interaction with people.

Sue and I also were partners in crime.  When Ms. Verone died, her family deliberately kept the obituary and the funeral information out of the local newspapers to keep out the riff raff.  Sue, being the resourceful woman that she was, called up the big funeral parlor in town and asked when services were scheduled for Ms. Verone.  Then Sue and I crashed the funeral!  When we got there, Verone's daughter-in-law had quite a dilemma:  throw us out on our ear, or play the gracious Southern hostess.  Lucky for us, good breeding won out and we were allowed to pay our respects to Ms. Verone, founder of the Whiskey Widows.

I'm sure that Sue was warmly welcomed into heaven by Verone, Dottie with the Body and Ms. Frances and that they're having one heck of a party with the Man Upstairs!

For all the saints...

The beautiful flowers arrived at my office on Friday, a gift from my father.  The occasion?  My father sends me flowers every year on October 30 to commemorate my mother's birthday.  This year Mom would have turned eighty (she was born the day after the great stock market crash of 1929!)  Mom was an extremely talented and beautiful woman, artistically gifted with limitless creativity (who else would have dressed their kid up as Mighty Mouse for Halloween?!).  She wrote poetry and double acrostics (!) and made fried chicken and potato salad that people still rave about.  But she was also one of those highly versatile and accomplished people who can't live up to their own dreams and expectations, and she died in September 2000.  People tell me I inherited her creativity; I know I inherited her romantic view of the world.

Ave atque vale:  My mentor, Roger Hornsby, passed away last week. My relationship to Roger goes back many years, even before my birth. The silver Tiffany cup in the photo above was his present to me when I was born. Roger was a tremendous influence, not just academically.  He showed me Rome when I graduated from college and years later I showed him Vienna.  I last saw Roger in August, and he was still perusing the train time tables for Europe as his bedtime reading.  Those who knew him know that there was and will be no one like Roger Hornsby.

Also saying goodbye to Whiskey Widows:
Frances Paula Holliday
Dorothy "Dottie with the Body" Smith
and
Anna Kolder

Whiskey and Funerals

We buried Ms. Dottie last week... for those of you in the know, that's "Dottie with the Body." Dottie was a member of the Whiskey Widows, a select group of elderly women who lived in my old apartment complex. Ms. Dottie always introduced herself as "Hi, I'm Dottie... with the Body." Of course, she didn't introduce herself to me that way, but rather to the attractive young man who was helping me move in. Dottie was a bit of a flirt :-)

When I first arrived, I was greeted by a neighbor who said, "We have cocktails every day at 5:00 pm at Ms. Verone's. You have a standing invitation to join us." Ms. Verone was the widow of the lieutenant governor under Earl K. Long. She was in her mid-80s and owing to a bum knee, she was virtually confined to her apartment (except when she ventured out in her indestructible Lincoln Town Car). Her social life was the cocktail hour, and she entertained us with stories of Louisiana politics, and fed us appetizers like olive cheese balls* and shrimp salad. On LSU game day, there was always a crowd at Ms. Verone's.

Carolyn, Dottie, Frances, Jerry, Sue, Nancy, Fred

For every Whiskey Widow there's a story: Ms. Frances was the daughter of a publisher and taught in the Baton Rouge schools even though she didn't need the money. She owned half a condo on the corner of Esplanade and Bourbon Street in New Orleans. She was very generous with the key, and I stayed there at least twice. Ms. Doris was the secretary for five Louisiana governors, including Jimmie Davis (who wrote "You are my Sunshine"). Sue B. also worked for the Baton Rouge schools trying to make a difference. There are two Ms. Margarets and a BeBe, and a number of us who just like to be inspired by these phenomenal women.

Because of their advanced age, the Whiskey Widows are becoming rarer and rarer. Verone died in 2005, the weekend of Hurricane Rita. Sue B. and I crashed her funeral (a long, sad story, best saved for another time). Ms. Frances died this past summer. And now Dottie... with the Body.

Contrary to their moniker, the Whiskey Widows prefer vodka martinis with a green cocktail tomato. Drink one this weekend in their honor, and to the health of those remaining!

Joey and Dottie

* Verone's Olive Cheese Balls:

½ lb. cheddar cheese, shredded
1 stick butter, chilled and shredded
1 ½ cups flour
cayenne pepper
worcestershire sauce
Jar of pimiento-stuffed olives

Combine the shredded cheddar cheese, the cold shredded butter, flour and cayenne pepper to taste. Prepare as for a pastry dough/pie crust, adding just enough worcestershire sauce to hold the mixture together. Wrap individual olives in the dough about an 1/8 of an inch thick. Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes. TIP: These freeze well and can be reheated!